Once again I find myself lost in the Christian world. Surely this should not be! We're repeatedly told that the Christian community is like a family, we are all brothers or sisters. I like the idea, in some ways, but we have all experienced family times when it's not all love and kindness haven't we?
I am taking a break from the church community I have belonged to for the past 9 years. I doubt I will return. I have just deleted a long rant that I was going to publish about my reasons for leaving etc. but have decided to put 'my big boy pants on' and not go there.
Here in New Zealand, the Methodist Church of New Zealand publishes a monthly 'newspaper' named Touchstone. The August 2021 edition contained an article written by Rev. Geraldine Coats in which she states that she has decided to no longer refer to herself as a Christian minister. Instead she has decided to call herself a follower of Jesus. She advises that she was led to this decision, in part, by some of Christianity's decisions which have destroyed her vision of a God of grace and love.
After my experiences over the years, and I'm on the cusp of 76, I find myself in agreement with Geraldine. I have witnessed bullying, bribery, back-stabbing, lying and abuse. Geraldine's God of grace and love has been notably absent on many occasions. However (and there is always a but isn't there?) there are some good people attending Christian churches who believe themselves to be Christians, and possibly are followers of Jesus. I pray that their attempts to follow Jesus in their congregations are successful.
As for me? Well I continue my pilgrimage. Currently I am at peace with myself as I undertake my given task of loving my wife as she recovers from a stroke and the thrombectomy that removed a clot from her brain.
I will try and be a follower of Jesus.
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